As society changes, many things change. Culture changes, the church and its methods change, styles change, fads change, and one thing that does change is the way the majority of the parent’s parent their teenager. Parents seem to go through cycles just like culture, and they change and adapt to the culture. I want to give you a few “old-fashioned” parenting tips today that I think it would not hurt if we went back too. I was parented in a very conservative old-fashioned way, and many other families held to some of these principles, and I want to give you a few of the old-fashioned tips that parents may need to resort back too:

  1. Making church a priority– In my house, church was not an option. Seriously, I could have a head ache, but if I did not have a fever, I would be at church. It frustrated me to no end then, but today, I am so grateful, because I never have a problem or a thought of skipping church. Today though, that is not the case. I feel students skip church for homework, sports, fun activities or amusements, or with a slight little head ache that they claim to have when they are fine doing other things with the same head ache. I wonder if believers made church a higher priority if our communities and nation might be a bit different.
  2. The School Staff is the authority in the school– When I was growing up, if I got into trouble with a teacher (which happened regularly), my parents never took my side. Once again, this way of parenting frustrated me at the time, but today, it has taught me an incredible amount of respect and loyalty to my authority. I am amazed at the number of parents who fight to prove the teacher is wrong when their student clearly did wrong. In a way, we are unintentionally teaching our kids to get their way, and buck the authority that has been instituted above us. Parents, do not be afraid to admit and teach your kids that they have been wrong. It may hurt them at the time, but we need to grow a generation up who can admit their faults and failures.
  3. The Pastor’s words of wisdom means something to our families– I am not saying that everything that the pastor says, you must agree with. Now, if it is coming straight from the Bible, you are commanded to believe it. I am talking about the wisdom and principles that the pastor may point out in a counseling session. For instance, my pastor encouraged my parents not to have a television or computer in my room. It is not found in the Bible, but it was a principle that he had learned from experience, and my parents listed to it.
  4. Youth functions are non-negotiable if affordable– One thing that my parents did with me was take me to every youth function that our church did. Some of them, I did not enjoy, and some of them quite frankly were boring, but my parents wanted me to go anyway. Now, obviously, if they were expensive events, and we could not afford them, sometimes on occasion, I would not be able to attend. For the most part though, I was at everything, and it taught me an incredible commitment to the local church and its community. Today, we give our kids so many options that if we get time to be a part of the church doing an event, we will make it, but we must get the 10 other things on our list finished first. Be committed to the church, and teach your kids commitment to the local church and its functions.
  5. Full time Christian Service is a possibility– Now, I am not in any way saying that every kid should be full-time in the ministry. I am saying that it should always be a possibility for any kid though. After all, we are called to be a follower of Jesus regardless of our occupation. Parents, do not discourage your kid because they may want to go serve God out of the state, or even out of the country. My parents always have said, “they would rather me in the center of God’s will out of the country than out of God’s will next door to them.”

There are a lot of things about the “old-fashioned” way of parenting that I do not agree with, but I personally do not think that it would be a bad idea to get back to these 5 ways of parenting.

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5 thoughts on “5 “Old Fashioned” parenting tips it wouldnt hurt to get back too

  1. I totally agree with all five points but I’ll admit as a parent, I have failed in some of these areas. No one is perfect. Not making excuses, just saying, as a parent, I too, am a work in progress. My prayer daily is that Jimmy and I set the right examples for our children to follow so that they can say they were taught the right way. We have two prodical children and I believe we are reaping our consequences of sin from our days of being unsaved parents. Something we pray about daily for these two children. We have asked for their forgiveness and now live daily for Christ to try and set the right examples for them to see. I don’t want Rachael to love God out of our desire for her to do so, even though that is our greatest desire. I want her to love God because she has a personal love relationship with him and desires to please him in all that she does! I see “Christian children” being raised in “Christian homes” being sent to “Christian schools” and they have no love relationship with Jesus Christ. They are performers only. And I also think that as adults, there is no greater example we can show to our children than to admit when we have messed up and failed them which leads me to point #2. We have always taught our children to be respectful of their authority, including school faculty and administration. We don’t make excuses for them but rather tell them, “if you do wrong in school, you will be punished at home as well.” But we must also remember teachers and administrators are human too and can make mistakes. I recently had a teacher come to me and humbly tell me that a poor grade one of my daughter’s test which led to a drop in her overall grade was her (teachers) fault due to the fact that the kids had missed 60 percent of her classroom time and had only had one test during the 18 week quarter. And on this particular test, they were unable to review due to sickness in the school, which led to inadequate preparation for the test. I was upset because this had dropped my daughter’s grade by 2 letter grades but I was overwhelmed with joy when this same teacher told my daughter the next day that she would allow her to re-take the test after they did an after school review of the material missed in the classroom. This teacher has now forever imprinted a Godly example for my daughter to follow. My daughter said to me, “I respect her more than anyone because she admitted her faults as a teacher and made it right.” As Believers in Christ, Jimmy and I seek wisdom daily from God and pray for guidance on raising our daughter. She is 18 now and we tell her often, “you are accountable for your sins to God” and that should be much more important than your accountability to us. We will not be able to go off to college with her and tell her when she is getting ready to fall into tempation of sin. She tells us that she is a Believer in Christ, having accepted him and asking forgiveness of her sins, so she must listen and be obedient to the Holy Spirit! We tell her, “Love God not because we are telling you to but because you desire to have that love relationship with him and through that love relationship, you will be obedient to him!” “And if you are obedient to him, then you will have no problems from your parents.” Deuteronomy 6:5
    And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

    1. Thanks for your transparency Angie! Praying for you and Jimmy. I understand in my short tenure of working with students how difficult it is to parent a teen. I am already nervous about those days with Lynlee. I am here for you guys if you need us.

      1. You and Abby partnered along side us in one of our most difficult times with our youngest. We were determined to fight for her and not let the Devil take reign in her life. She has matured so much this past year, spiritually and mentally. She now tells us she understands why we were so severe in our punishment with her and the boundaries we set out. Even now, we are still guarded with her and she understands. She is more obedient now to the Holy Spirit and to us. I know that is due to answered prayers by us, you, Abby and many more that were praying. God is still working in her heart and it thrills us when she speaks of his forgiveness and mercy he showed her during that time and still shows to her daily. Love you guys! We pray for you, Abby, and Lynlee and pray for God’s guidance for all of you.

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