This week, I want to provide you with a lesson on sex and dating. This can be used with students, and I have taught this lesson before. Hope this helps you to communicate the truth of Scripture to your students.
Download the powerpoint here: True Love Waits
I Corinthians 6:9-18; I Thessalonians 4:3-8
Introduction: This evening, I want you to be honest with you and with God about the idea of sex and dating. The thought that I would like for you to get a hold of tonight is, “True Love Waits.” I want to answer a few questions that you may have about dating and about sex. I also want to leave you with some principles that can help you avoid falling into sexual sin. By age 20, 81% of unmarried males have had sex. Some statements to begin with:
- The primary purpose of dating is to prepare yourself and discover who your future spouse is.
- It is a natural desire to be attracted to the opposite sex!
- God created sex. Sex is a good thing if it in the realm of what God created it for.
- God created sex for the marriage relationship of one man and one woman.
Quote: Andy Stanley said, “When you participate in sex outside of marriage, you forfeit the opportunity to become uniquely one physically with their future husband or wife.”
If I told you that you could have $1 now and $1,000,000 10 years from now, which one would you choose? All of us would wait for the 1,000,000 if we were honest. That just makes sense. Well, it is similar to your future spouse. What if I was to tell you that you could have sex now, but wait for the perfect time in the realm of God’s Will later. All of us would probably say, we would wait, but why does so many students fall into sexual sin? They choose to take what is supposed to come later right now, and they cannot patiently wait for God’s perfect timing.
What does the Bible say? I Corinthians 6:9-18
Here in this passage, the Apostle Paul writes to two churches where this was an issue. The church at Corinth and the church at Thessalonica. The word, fornication mentioned here simply means any illegitimate sex act outside of marriage. It comes from the Greek word, pornea, where we get the word, pornography. So, the Apostle Paul is stating through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit that fornication is wrong, and against the will of God for your life! It is sin.
How Far is too Far?
Live with this principle: “How far would I want my future spouse to go with the guy she was with right before she met me?” Josh McDowell said, “This is the standard that I adopted before I married: I will treat a woman on a date the same way I want some other man to treat the woman I will someday marry.”
- The further you go, the faster you go
- The further you go, the further you want to go.
- The further you go, the harder it is for you to go back
What about Culture?
Here are some thoughts on what culture is telling our generation:
- We are planning on getting married
- Everybody is having sex
- Sex is a natural part of a loving relationship
- “We love each other!”
- Sex is part of growing up
Culture drills into society that sex is one of the things that makes boys become men, and this is far from the truth! It actually makes more of a man to wait than it does not go ahead and have sex before marriage.
Fire is awesome in the fireplace but fire is not awesome on the carpet. It has the potential to burn down the entire house. Sex is like fire. It is good in the rounds of marriage, but it has the potential to burn your relationships or your future marriage if it goes outside the realm of marriage.
So, how can I protect myself?
I. A strong relationship with God is the best Spiritual protection
Make sure God is first in your life and make a commitment to keep Him there. The moment you mess up sexually, God has been removed from the throne of your life.
If you’re dating relationship lessons your walk with God, you should get out of the relationship until you have your relationship with God where it needs to be.
Learn to find your contentment in just you and God!
II. Learn how to honor and respect the women God has already placed in your life
How you treat your mom is the way you will treat your future spouse!
You can learn how to be a good husband by learning how to be a good son or brother!
III. Don’t put yourself in a position to be tempted
Don’t find yourself alone in the house with the opposite sex
It opens you up to temptation, and the flesh to take over.
54% of teens that messed up sexually messed up at their house or their partner’s.
IV. Be cautious with the computer or television screen
V. Set very high standards in dating
All of you need to have some standards in dating. If you do not, you are not ready to date.
One student who messed up sexually said, “set your standards of what you would or would not do on a date and stick by them!”
“You must determine where you want to end before you begin!”
Have a list of standards first.
Where you set your standard will dictate your next temptation. For instance, if I set the standard as just kissing, and no further, I have already set the temptation of what is next. That is why we need to set high standards!
I encourage you to “set aside the physical and focus in on building a relationship!”
VI. Be accountable
Write down your standards and give them to an accountability partner who will help you keep your standards!
What if I have already messed up?
I John 1:9: This verse keeps me going. I can go to Jesus knowing that He will forgive me every time for my wrongdoing. He can forgive you right now, but allow His power in you to strengthen you not to make the same mistake again!
God’s grace and forgiveness is available to you right now!